Fudge it!
by SeikoTuNeR
Summary: No one ever told Naruto ANBU training was going to be easy. But he joined anyway but now he wants out. But you don't just leave without any repercussions..


Okay people. Or.. Manga readers.. more specifically, online manga readers. I'm sure everyone sort of glazed over the spot where Shizune seemed a bit overzealous in bugging Tsunade _about_ Naruto. I thought that scene was a bit random, since they had already

** Spoilers bitches! **

confirmed that Sai was going to be on Naruto's team. Shizune just _pestered_ Tsunade with question after question about Naruto. So you can draw two conclusions.

Shizune cares for Naruto, but in that family/friendly sort of way.

Or, if any of you can possibly figure out that I love obscure pairings...

NARUSHIZU!

NaruShizu is canon. Kiss my firm brown Asian ass.

Chapter 1

Heavy and thick rain pounded endlessly on the village of Konoha. Dark stormy clouds gave a roar quickly bringing a flash of light, illuminating the dark village for a brief moment.

A lone shinobi slowly walked down a puddled path in extreme effort not pass out before getting home.

Rain. Water. The supposed bringer of life. Life's first attempt was said to have started in a puddle.

Uzumaki Naruto snorted at the notion. Who gave a crap what the experts say. He hated rain. It got in his hair, made other people sick, who would in turn _sneeze_ on him, and it just plain dropped his mood.

And the leaks. Dear heavens have mercy the leaks in his apartments pissed the shit out of him. He'd fall asleep with his mouth open and would almost choke on the disgusting water that went through the roof, the glue that held the roof on...

Gross.

Naruto kicked his door open (he never locked it) and gave a quick scan and a sniff from his nose to see if anyone was in here. Sakura's familiar scent floated in, and so did Iruka's, though Iruka's scent was stale and old. Most likely from when he was there yesterday.

Naruto hadn't seen Sakura in what seemed like weeks. But she cared enough to show up once in a while to make sure he was still alive and had food.

Tonights meal (or breakfast, it was three in the morning) was some sort of concoction of vegetables, meat, and a side dish of rice.

Far to lazy too warm it up, (along with avoiding the smell that came with heating up stir fried) he shoveled it all down.

It was cold, the taste was probably a little stale, but it was great compared to the shitty rations ANBU personnel got for distant assignments.

Perhaps knowing that it was personally made by an old friend made it better, but still.

Rations sucked fish sauce.

He looked over to his right and notice a small box. He opened it and looked inside to find a strawberry vanilla slice of cake. Naruto winced. Did he just flake out on Sakura's birthday?

Naruto finished up his meal and cleared everything away. He pulled off his foot wear and looked irritably at his calloused foot. He flicked the bottom of his foot, slightly chuckling at the fact that he couldn't even feel the flick.

He tore off his clothes and armor, almost zombie like and head towards the bathroom. He glanced at his calender and there in his tiny print read "Sakura's Birthday!" He sighed and made plans to get her something eventually

He turned the water on and stepped in.

As the ice cold water hit his body, he didn't even flinch. He lathered himself off to get rid of the sweat, the musk and the overpowering smell of blood.

But blood never really went away. It was always there, with its metallic coppery taste, its smell that just couldn't be described, the way it ruined all of his clothes, the way it always got stuck underneath his fingernails..

He hated blood more than he hated rain.

Naruto made his short journey from the bathroom to his room in a slight daze. He leaned against his table to pull his undershorts out, but he just stayed there.

He noticed something that hadn't been there before.

It was a picture roughly three years old. He had just come back with Jiraiya and was hopping around with Sakura and Kakashi.

Kakashi, as usual, had his head in his book walking slightly behind Naruto and Sakura. He seemed to be talking about something to Sakura, whom oddly enough seemed interested.

The picture was a rather good close up, no blurs or odd beams of light shining.

He studied his face for a long time.

It didn't look at all like it did in the picture. He had this brilliant tan and sparkling blue eyes. His face had more of a circular shape, and his hair just seemed to scream spunk.

His reflection looked down right evil. His eyes were dull shade of blue, his hair drooped down, seemingly loosing its ability to defy gravity, his tan was gone, and he had light bags under his eyes from lack of sleep.

He thought about how many people he had killed in a span of two years. He couldn't remember. He used to keep exact memories of every person he's had to kill in the name of Konoha, for his own guilt trip. But recently, his memories of them had begun to fade.

He wasn't sure if he was happy or not.

He hadn't had a nightmare in a long time, and he had always personally welcomed them. He felt normal with them.

Naruto hated to kill. Even those who deserved it, whose lifestyle begged for it. He hated it more than blood and rain put together. But he was supposed to not only accept it, but do it as many times needed.

He tried to remember his childhood 'Ninja Way'. He couldn't recall it right now, but he had a feeling he was breaking his own oath.

He wasn't an official ANBU squad member, but a trainee. Tactics, techniques, mind games, communication were drilled into his brain all during missions. He could tell he was being brainwashed into their thinking, but he fought it.

Now that he thought about it, his superiors actually _told_ him all ANBU are modified to an extent. To keep them from hesitating or some crap like that.

He watched with some foreboding sense of curiosity as a single drop of rain water went from his eye down to his chin. He irritably looked up at the link only to find it wasn't there.

It was a tear.

As another one slid down his cheek he glanced at himself confusedly. He was in more of denial than anything else.

He was miserable. He hated being a shinobi. He hated early mornings and late nights. He hated watching the life leave the eyes of his new statistic. But he couldn't quit. He was a man of his word. He _never_ quits.

But he missed his friends more than anything else. Before heading off into ANBU he was just starting to finally getting to know everyone more.

He learned Neji vented by not only pushing his body in training, but by watching porn.

Lee owned every gaming system in history (even though he hardly played them since he graduated)

Tenten had an unhealthy obsession with explosion, then again, so did he.

Hinata had a _crush_ on _him. _He still wasn't sure what to think on that subject.

Shino wrote short novels in his spare time.

Kiba could actually play three different instuments.

He learned Shikamaru was a fantastic Go player.

Chouji ate everything in sight (he had already guessed that _before_ he started talking to him)

Ino loved watching cartoons.

And Sakura loved strawberry vanilla cakes for her birthdays.

But he knew deep down that his problems now would pale in comparison to being a Hokage. With that position, he wouldn't be the one killing or loosing touch with his friends, he'd be the one _choosing_ who gets to kill with the possibly of sending his own comrade who just might get killed on the damn mission he sent them to.

Naruto chuckled darkly.

"Fuck the free world."

wwwwwwwwwwwww

On a typical Wednesday afternoon, Tsunade wasn't hounded by work. When she had first got the job, things were so hectic because of the recent invasion from Sound and Sand. Buildings needed to be constructed, newer safety measures were being implemented to keep civilians and younger shinobi in training safe, beefed up security, and better qualified Chunins. There were countless others that kept her up into the wee hours of the morning, if it hadn't been for Shizune, Tsunade was sure she'd go insane. Speaking of Shizune, she hadn't seen her the past couple of days. Shizune had left her a note saying she was taking a leave of absence... still.

But back to her old busy schedule, that was almost five years ago. Things still were a bit uptight, but it wasn't anything that strangled her from when she got up till she dropped on her head unconscious.

She sat in her chair mulling over an individual that she didn't want to admit, but missed dearly with a dose of growing concern.

Uzumaki Naruto had jumped Jonin status and went straight into being recruited into the notorious ranks of the ANBU. She had never really cared for the group, with their merciless training, strict code of constant _vigilance_, it all irked her. She knew they were needed and important, not to mention under her direct authority, but she never really got along with them. She used them for her purposes and that was that.

But ever since Naruto had been recruited, her annoyance with them only grew. Naruto, ever the ambitious one, gave it a nights sleep and joined. Over the past year, she'd seen less and less of him. Her most recent visit with him had infuriated her the most.

He looked so bone dead tired. His smile was so pathetic and slapped on, she wanted to smack him across the room and yell at him to act normal. She knew he was nearing a breaking point, and she couldn't do much to help. Even though she had authority over the ANBU as a whole, she had no power over who was to be recruited (though she could recommend) and couldn't strip someone of their membership unless under extreme circumstance.

Naruto was hardly ever home, so she couldn't even talk to him enough to even try to suggest the idea of leaving the damned thing. She tried to stop thinking about but her eyes wondered over to a picture of him and Sakura almost over a year ago. The difference between the picture and her current vision of Naruto made her shudder.

There was a knock at her door that gave her more of a shock than it should have.

"Come in."

The door opened and an ANBU member walked in and removed her mask. She had a young but stern face, with hair that one couldn't describe any other than the color purple that went down to her back. Her armor hid her body well, but other than that, she was one of ANBU's top members.

"Bizen Sayoko, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

Sayoko was the only one who didn't annoy her. Maybe it was because she was female. Tsunade wondered if she was unconsciously sexist.

She blamed Jiraiya.

"Hokage-sama. We have a bit of a problem."

Her elegant eyebrows rosed a notch.

"Problem?"

"Uzumaki Naruto has been missing for two days."

Tsunade rose to her feet, already having a sick feeling pitted in her stomach.

"Two days? Why haven't I been notified before?"

Sayoko pulled out a small stack of papers from her pouch.

"These were a couple of messages that got routed to Shizune. A number of people didn't know she was on a leave."

Before Tsunade could figure out what to do they both noticed two familiar chakra signatures nearing the door.

"Uzumaki!" Sayoko had whirled around and was glaring daggers at Naruto.

"Bizen?" Tsunade noted that he looked a tad healthier from the last time she saw him. And then of all people, Shizune was standing next to him.

"Uzumaki-" Tsunade cut her off.

"Naruto, where have you been these past two days?"

Naruto looked from Tsunade to Bizen, and figured talking to Tsunade was a better choice. Bizen didn't look too happy.

"I sent a personal letter to you .. two days ago. You never got it?"

Sayoko clipped voice went across the room.

"And you didn't even notify your superiors as well? What of your ANBU responsibilities?"

Naruto's almost carefree demeanor disappeared and he went cold.

"According to article four section one in the laws governing ANBU personnel, my resignation only needs to be sent to Hokage-sama.

Odd loophole it was, she couldn't really fire anyone, but they had to notify her if they wanted to quit.

Tsunade went around the table and took the papers from Sayoko, who at the time seemed to have lost it. She found his resignation and his letter.

His print was irritatingly small, but at least legible.

_Tsunade-sama :]_

_I'm going to leave for a few days. I don't know how to put it, but I can't really deal with the ANBU right now. I hope you don't think of me as a coward for quiting the ANBU, but maybe I'll tell you the crap thats been going on in person._

_Naruto_

"You.. you quit? Why? You have so much potential and power.."

"I didn't want to anymore. That's all. You don't need to ask a bunch of questions about it."

"Bizen." Tsunade called out, "I believe you can go now."

There was definitely more to Naruto's relationship with her than they were letting on.

"Yes mam'. Hokage-sama, Shizune.." She gave a short bow but her eyes lingered on Naruto longer than they should have, but nothing in her posture or eyes gave anything else that would have revealed her intent.

She put her mask on and walked out.

Tsunade put a stern front and said in her most authoritative voice "So you quit?"

He impishly scratched his head.

"Uh yeah.."

Tsunade quickly embraced him, gently, she didn't want to crush him. Yet.

"Thank God. The last time I saw you, I thought you were dying."

Naruto slowly returned the hug and enjoyed the experience he was denied a great number of times in his life.

"I was. That's why I quit."

Tsunade let go and tried to hide the tears that were threatening to fall.

"Aw? Was the big meanie Hokage actually worried for little ol' me?"

Putting her extreme relief aside, Tsunade grabbed him from the neck of his shirt and threw him out the window.

"Fucking haaaag!"

Tsunade than averted her attention to Shizune who busied herself by scrummaging through the papers she put on the desk.

"Shizune? You've been with Naruto these past couple of days?"

"Hai. I'm sorry.. I didn't mean any harm.."

Tsunade laughed. "Are you kidding me? I'm glad. Give him another year with ANBU I'm sure he'd have snapped. And I'm sure you showed him a good time?"

Shizune gave a short chuckle. "Course. He's so old but.. theres so many things he hasn't done or seen. With all that raging inner kid in him, it surprised me the whole time how he seemed to question me on everything he saw. You forget sometimes, with the way he acts, that he's been alone his entire childhood."

"Hmm." Tsunade looked thoughtful.

"But _what_ exactly did you two do? If I didn't know any better, I could have sworn he was holding your hand on the way in.."

Shizune looked surprised herself. " I honestly don't know. We were fine just walking along side each other, but when we got close to your office, he started tensing up and when he saw Bizen he grabbed my hand."

"Odd."

"I know."

Naruto climbed his way though the window, huffing and puffing, and pissed to no end.

"Damn it! Do I look huge and have white enormous hair?"

Shizune and Tsunade laughed at him, which only irritated him further.

"Not fair. I didn't even see it coming!"

"Its okay, Naruto." Shizune cooed. "All in good fun!"

Naruto's eyes bulged out.

"Good _fun_? Good fun is watching a movie or video taping Kakashi get chased around by a herd of women, not getting thrown out of a twenty-four stories building at over a hundred miles per frickin' hour!"

Still laughing, Tsunade figured today was a day and herded Shizune and Naruto out the door.

"C'mon, brat. We're going to my place. Then you can tell me _everything_ thats been happening to you."

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Gyea! Ground breaking NaruShizu stuff. Sort of. Not yet I suppose. I hope you all enjoyed this. I don't know how much effort I'm going to put into this since I really want to finish Blondie, but this idea's been buggin the shit outta me since I started on Blondie.


End file.
